Rage Bait

Rage baiting individuals seems accomplishing at times. Like a personal win with the triumphant hit to ones ego. The jab that seems to twist in the sides of a narcissistic prick, who thought he got the last word but in fact was left pondering his next move. How is it that we are so affected by words? The attack on a mans masculinity or the ambush of a woman’s emotional state seems to be a popular bullseye in the war of words. When does logical thinking end and rage enter? Do we see red or do we hold our composure when it comes to those sly disses?

A few things that have helped me through the years that I later learned were rage bait and NOT a controlled reaction are the following:

1. When a person cuts you off mid sentence say the phrase “I apologize, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the start of yours?” This helps call them out on their rude mannerless behavior.

2. If an individual starts to raise their voice remind them in a calm tone “don't raise your voice but improve your argument.” This makes them realize their emotions are playing too much of a role on their cognitive abilities.

3. Lastly when you have just told a story or fact that you are passionate about and the opposing party immediately try’s to top the story with theirs say “thats a great story, could you tell that again.” This makes their story look less important.

The beat red reaction and steam that will expel from the persons ears says enough in itself. I have recently found comfort in not reacting when they want a reaction. Why would I give them what they want? I find myself wondering if they moan as loud as I do when I sink that verbal blade. I think its a self victory on both ends when dealing with a verbally abuse pirate because I bait them enough to let them continue to speak but then I make them look more uneducated with their response.

Stating that they aren’t a C-section baby because they avoid labor is another great way to rage bait the lazy person at your place of business. The simple counter attack of “you seem emotional right now” could be portrayed as compassion but I guarantee this will piss people off.

It takes great strength and stamina to go toe to toe with a fellow rage baiter. I would almost prefer to befriend those who can morally navigate disrespect in a counterfeit respectful way. It’s an art at this point in my old age. What a scholar to be able to match that kind of energy.

Why does the phrase “calm down” have a huge triggering reaction out of people? Is it the simple fact of being told what to do that irks the nervous system? Control could be a leading cause of agitation with most people in my experience. The escalation of anger due to a dominant response plays a factor in specific phrases with most of the population. It may be construed as dismissal of ones legitimate concern or lack of interest in said topic.

The invalidation of feelings, Commanding cognitive shutdown, or even misconstrued context powers the conversation but with immediate intent to flatline the situation or conversation can be used in your favor depending on tone. A Great example is one day I was at my gym in the weight racks and a gentleman came up to me and said, “ you know if you keep lifting like that your gonna look like a man.” I smiled and followed with the comment, “If you started lifting you might look like a man too.” This individual never approach due again.

I was told as a young child while watching a boxing match with my dad, that when the fighter got mad he would lose the round. Getting mad made you only focus on that and not the main goal of winning. This came in handy as a pre-teen when I would fight with other kids in the streets of my hometown. The more angry I got them the sloppier they got. I was guaranteed a win if I could get under their skin. Looking back at this and applying it now has not only made me successful in an argument but it also helped me gain the corporate ladder over others who’s emotions couldn’t be kept in check.